Supporting someone you love
Worried About Someone You Love? Start Here.
Practical guidance for families and friends worried about someone’s drinking or drug use, and a private place to work out the next step.
- on this page
When concern starts taking over
You Do Not Need a Diagnosis to Take This Seriously
You may be checking where they are, covering consequences, trying to keep the peace or wondering whether you are overreacting. Addiction often affects the people around it long before the person using is ready to name the problem.
Start with the behaviour and its impact. You already have enough information to decide what support you need and what you are no longer willing to carry.
Patterns worth noticing
Look at What Is Happening, Not What They Call It
01
Their drinking or drug use is becoming more frequent, secretive or difficult to control
02
Work, finances, health or relationships are being affected
03
You are covering for them, lending money or trying to prevent the next crisis
04
Promises to stop or cut down are repeatedly followed by the same pattern
05
Your own life is increasingly organised around monitoring, managing or worrying about them
Starting the conversation
Concern Is More Useful When It Is Clear
The aim is to say what you have seen, explain its impact and offer a practical route to help. Keep it simple enough that you can stay grounded even if their first response is denial, anger or avoidance.
01
Choose the moment
Speak when they are as sober, calm and safe as possible. A crisis or argument rarely creates the best conditions for an honest conversation.
02
Use what you know
Describe specific things you have seen and how they have affected you. You do not need to win an argument about whether they have an addiction.
03
Offer a real next step
Have one clear option ready, such as speaking privately with Foundations, arranging an assessment or discussing treatment.
04
Know your boundary
Decide what you will do if they refuse help. Choose something you can follow through on and that protects your wellbeing and safety.
A useful place to begin
“I care about you. I’ve noticed things are getting worse, and I’m worried. I’m willing to help you speak to someone about treatment.”
Boundaries and support
Helping Does Not Mean Absorbing Every Consequence
A boundary is a decision about what you will do. It needs to be specific, realistic and focused on safety or wellbeing. Repeated threats that cannot be maintained make an already unstable situation harder.
You can remain loving while refusing to fund use, hide what is happening or accept unsafe behaviour.
A boundary
“I will not give you money or cover debts connected to your use.”
A boundary
“I will leave the conversation if you become threatening or abusive.”
A boundary
“You cannot stay in my home while you are using.”
support
“I will help you speak to a treatment provider and arrange practical next steps.”
When safety comes first
Some Situations Need Urgent Help
If there is an overdose, severe withdrawal, violence, suicidal behaviour, loss of consciousness or another immediate danger, contact local emergency services or go to the nearest emergency department.
Do not ask someone to stop alcohol, benzodiazepines or other physically dependent substances suddenly without appropriate medical advice. Withdrawal can be dangerous.
Foundations provides planned addiction treatment and is not an emergency or crisis service.
If they are willing to talk
You Do Not Need to Have Every Detail Worked Out
One confidential conversation can establish what is happening, whether detox may be needed and whether residential treatment at Foundations could be suitable.
Our programme is deliberately small, private and shaped around the individual. Treatment can bring together medical and psychiatric input where appropriate, individual and group work, practical recovery tools, movement, connection and a clear plan for life after Bali.
residential rehab at glance
- The substances involved and how often they are used
- Current medication and relevant health concerns
- Previous detox, rehab or recovery attempts
- Immediate risks or recent crises
- Practical questions about timing, travel and cost
Looking after yourself
Their Addiction Is Affecting You Too
Sleep, work, finances, relationships and your own sense of stability can all become damaged by living around addiction. Support for yourself is part of responding well, whether or not they accept treatment.
Consider speaking with a therapist, family support service or peer group. You deserve somewhere honest to talk, clear your thinking and decide what you need.
Questions families ask
Clear Answers Before You Make the Call
You can contact us without committing anyone to treatment.
Can I contact Foundations before they agree to treatment?
Yes. Families and friends can speak with us privately, explain what has been happening and ask questions before the person is ready to call.
Can I book treatment for someone else?
You can gather information and help with arrangements, but the person will generally need to agree to treatment and take part in the admissions process.
Should I organise an intervention?
A planned intervention can be useful in some situations, but it should be approached carefully. We can help you consider whether a direct family conversation, professional intervention support or another route makes sense.
What if they refuse help?
You can still get support for yourself, stop shielding them from consequences where it is safe to do so, and set clear boundaries around what you will accept.
How involved can family be during treatment?
Family contact and involvement are shaped around the resident’s privacy, progress and what is clinically useful. The team will explain what to expect during admissions.
What if there is an immediate safety risk?
If you believe there is an overdose, severe withdrawal, violence, self-harm or another immediate danger, contact local emergency services or go to the nearest emergency department. Foundations is not an emergency service.
What happens when you reach out
You can call before they are ready.
01
We listen
Tell us what has been happening, in your own words and at your own pace.
02
We talk through your options
Ask anything you need to know about treatment, timing, costs, detox or coming to Bali.
03
We plan the next step
If Foundations feels right, we help make the process of getting here clear and manageable.
A private first step
Talk to Someone Who Understands
You do not need to be ready to commit. Speak with someone who understands addiction, ask your questions and find out whether Foundations may be right for you.
